Ã¯Â»Â¿Do you feel stuck? Struggling with your faith and prayer? It feels bad, right? But is it? I would say NO. I'd much rather you and I struggle and wrestle with our prayer and faith than sit numbly in a pew on Sunday. Lukewarm is not a good spiritual place to be.
"I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were cold or hot. So, because you are lukewarm and neither hot nor cold, I will vomit you out of my mouth." (Revelations 3:15-16)
I don't want to make God feel like throwing up. But if we care enough to struggle and try to figure out how we can pray and talk to God, then that is something. It's a desire God has placed on our hearts and the fact that we are entertaining that desire means, even in our struggles, we are participating in God's grace. We're not lukewarm.
Still, struggling feels icky. I know that's a juvenile word to describe it, but it fits perfectly. No one wants to feel stuck! It would be much easier to gloss over this unease and uncertainty about how to pray. To let ourselves be busy and numb. To calm that ache for something more with more activities and a promise to ourselves we'll get around to prayer someday soon.
But if you are standing firm in your desire to calm your mind, pray and talk to Jesus, then I applaud you. Even if it's hard and you are struggling and feel like a failure, yay for you! Because this is way better than being lukewarm. It might not be easy, but you are doing it. Don't give up.
"Ask, and it will be given to you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and it will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives. He who seeks finds. To him who knocks it will be opened." (Matthew 7:7-8)
If you keep trying to draw near to God, even when you feel stuck, eventually you will be able to feel Him draw near to you.